Swimsuit on Hold For a Few Days

My neice will be 9 yrs. old in a few weeks and I have been trying to find something to make for her. I wanted to make a shrug, but haven't found a pattern that I like and that would fit her, so I am making one up! This is my first attempt at making a pattern.

I am at a standstill for a few days while my Mom works the next section of the pattern so I get some guidance. I'm a little lost on the directions for the top and the side trim of the coverup. She's coming by on Sunday so I hope to be able to get back to it then. In the meantime, I am working on the shrug and will have it done by Sunday afternoon!

I haven't eaten well this week and while I have exercised, I haven't been 100% because of the back issue I had. But I am working on behaving just for today. And when I wake up tomorrow I will focus on just that day. Eventually, they'll add up to a healthier body!!

Making Progress on Swimsuit

I stayed up really late last night to work on the swimsuit. The cover up portion is taking way longer than I thought it would, but it's almost done. Then I am moving on to the bottom. My goal is to be able to post pics of the completed swimsuit on Feb.3 with my weightloss progress check. I hurt my back yesterday and spent most of the afternoon and evening with a heating pad on my back. It feels better today, but either way, it won't affect my cardio I plan to do today.

Wave of Anxiousness

I exercised and was doing well, until the after school, make dinner, do homework, unhappy baby wants picked up, groceries need put away, dishwasher needs unloaded and there is WAY TOO MUCH NOISE IN THIS HOUSE chaos struck. It was like a wave of anxiousness that I just couldn't maneuver through. I overate and wanted to sit and cry. There is just too much to do and not enough hands. I had put dinner in the crockpot and I try to do other things to make the afternoon easier but it's so difficult to get through without cheating.

So I'm going to do my best to stop the madness of overeating right now and after bedtime, I'm going to sit and crochet and get back to my vision of what I want for myself. That's why I love to crochet. Just THINKING about yarn is calming. Fellow crocheters know what I'm talking about.

Tomorrow I'll remind myself to walk away from the kitchen in the afternoon. Very soon we are turning our dining room into a den and that will help greatly. I'll have a place to retreat to with the children that's not a part of the kitchen/great room space.

Going To Be An Interesting Workout!

My daughter (15 months old) slept in this morning so I am off on my routine. By the time she goes down for a nap, there might not be time to exercise, so I am going to need to do it while she's awake. I have about 45 min. of fast dance music on my ipod list, so she and I are going to dance for Mommy's workout! I'll do abs and some weights when she naps, which I'll have time enough for, but I guess I just have to get creative. I mean, it's not like my body is saying "so sorry, you have to follow a legitimate tape made by a qualified instructor for me to let you burn calories." Does it have to be perfect to be done? The Flylady (see links) has a motto "housecleaning, even done imperfectly, still blesses your home." Isn't that true of our bodies?

Is It Really Friday Already?

I did both cardio and lower body weights yesterday and with the exception of snacking yesterday afternoon and larger portions for dinner last night, I have stuck to my diet all week. I started the swimsuit over last night and I have to say, I love the new yarn better! I bought 6 skeins of Caron Simply Soft Heather in the Plum color and it's beautiful! Better yet, it cost under $15 dollars! Had to really search to find the yarn though, but it was worth it!

I put in a graph to chart my weight loss in inches from the waist at the bottom of the page. I'll be revealing my progress on Feb.3rd. My goal is a 2 inch loss by then. Just in case anybody is wondering, when I measure my waist, I "suck in my gut" as much as I can so that each time I measure, I am consistent (I read to do that). The sad thing to admit is that my before pictures are of me not just sucking in my gut, but honestly when I did, NOTHING MOVED! Again, part of that honesty thing, and that is really really hard to do, but no harder than carrying around this extra weight and being under the delusion that I don't look as big as I am....but I am taking it one day at a time. I didn't gain this weight over night and it won't come off over night either.

Change of Yarn for Hot Mama Swimsuit

In the last few days we (DH and I) have decided to pursue a large purchase and I am going to need to be more selective about where I put my yarn money. Currently I am making the Hot Mama Swimsuit using a yarn that's pretty expensive and I still need about 10 balls of yarn to complete the project. If I purchase the 10 balls, it will be about $100!!! Yikes. So, I am going to start over using Caron Simply Soft. Might stay with the red, using their Autumn Spice or might change to a chocolate color. You will definately see the original yarn show up in a different garment before this is through.

Yesterday I went to see my grandfather and I had 2 mini successes: Passed on the large dessert I was offered and then when I stopped at Starbucks on the way home I was tempted to eat a reduced fat pastry but I asked for the nutrition info first. That stopped me dead in my tracks. What I wanted was around 300 calories! That's a small meal for me right now! So I just got a skinny latte. Yea Me!

I didn't get to exercise yesterday so I am combining yesterday and today's workouts- Cardio and Lower Body weights.

Another Great Day!

Today went really well. I got in a good cardio workout and stayed with my eating plan. I'm trying to make meals healthier, not just for me, but for the whole family. My youngest son (6) is resistant to anything not in a Burger King bag. But I'll keep trying!
Tomorrow I'm heading off to see my grandfather. He's is in his second week at a nursing home and is doing fairly well. His memory is pretty much gone, but his personality is back to where he was a few years ago. My Papa is a great man and my children are so lucky to have him still with us.

A Great Start to the Week

Today went really well. I exercised, followed my eating plan and managed to get some of my to do list completed. Now if I can just make it to bedtime without eating!

One small step towards a better life

I know it may not sound like much to anyone else, but to me it's huge. We went out to dinner tonight and my boys ordered their favorite: pancakes. I typically eat my own meal and then eat whatever is left of their pancakes. I'm embarrased to admit that, but if this is going to work, I really have to get to the knitty gritty of what is holding me back.
Well tonight I finished my meal and it wasn't until I handed over the boys' plates to the waitress that I realized I had not eaten from their plate. Wow! That's really big for me!

The week went ok, not great, but ok. I do know that there is no turning back for me. I'll just keep waking up everyday with the motivation to work towards a better body.

I am at a crocheting dilemma. I don't really feel as if I have earned the next batch of yarn that I need, but I am working with a discontinued yarn that I have only been able to find from one seller online. She has enough for me to compete the Hot Mama swimsuit, but I need to persue it before the yarn is gone. I don't think this week was a complete bust, but it wasn't a "clean" week either in the food and exercise dept. So, what I'm thinking is that I'll wait until Wed of next week and if I can say I have followed the program faithfully to that point, I'll go ahead and order it. It won't arrive for another week so I'll have more time to truly "earn" the yarn.
Hope to have some pics of my crocheting progress by end of next week.
I'll weigh in the first week of Feb. and take measurements then too.

New Week, New Hope

My goal this week and to have great things to report at the end of the week! My focus will be on healthy eating, exercise and not staying up late into the night. If all goes well I'll be able to order the yarn I need on Friday (since I cheated this week, I didn't get to order the yarn). So it's a new week and a new chance to get back on track.

Good News, Bad News...

I should just get to the bad news: I completely blew off the last two days. I could give a dozen of so-called good excuses and hey, didn't I just write about how not staying on track ruins your progress? There really aren't any great excuses.. I think it was just laziness, plain and simple. I want so badly to lose weight, but I know that to do what is necessary will take a complete overhaul with how I eat and how I live. And the question I have asked myself over the last 2 days is am I ready to do what is necessary? Am I ready to really make those changes? If I wanted to I could just delete this blog and go back to how things have been, but do I want that? The answer is NO NO NO!! I want something more for myself!!
So the good news is that I think the last two days have really helped "seal the deal" for me that I am in this for the long haul. It doesn't matter if I slip up here and there, what matters is that I get up and keep moving, instead of reaching for food to make me feel better.

Beware the Excuse Demon

I swear there's a little demon named "really, it's ok, do it." I wasn't able to exercise until 10:30 p.m. and that little demon started to urge me to just leave it until tomorrow- do it along with the other workout scheduled...it's ok...you're tired...your dog isn't feeling well...you have a busy day tomorrow...yadayadayada... This is where I usually agree, go to bed and wake up feeling defeated. But not tonight! Ha! I got on that *&^!!!(*&(*& Treadmill and gave it my all!
While there is certainly going to be days that screw up my exercise routine (baby gets sick, I'm sick, etc.), those days really need to be the exception and not the rule. When you give into those excuses you lose not just the chance for losing weight, but you lose momentum and you lose what little, precious, fragile confidence that you are struggling to build.
Speaking of fragile confidence, I took my measurements and all I can say is YIKES!!!! I'm not brave enough yet to post what they are, so I am going to post what they need to be to make my goal: I need to lose 12 inches in my waist, 5 inches in my hips and at least 2 inches in both thighs and arms. That's NOT to be a stick, that's to be a healthy size 12 and for a woman who's 5'9", size 12 is a realistic goal. That's alot to lose, so I am just going to concentrate on one inch at a time. Exercise, eat right, sleep well, think good thoughts and keep crocheting is really all I can do, but if I do it each day, I have faith that I'll reach my goal.

Didn't cheat and started the swimsuit

Hey, this thing just might work! I didn't cheat, exercised, and made it until 11 pm when my DH started to snack and I started to think "maybe I should still eat something small...to keep my metabolism going...yea....that's a good idea." But I KNEW I would have to write about my progress and come on, cheating on the first day? So, I decided to write a post, and I am going to bed!
Started the swimsuit- I love the color! I'm a few rows in and I think I am going to need more yarn! The balls of yarn I am using have half of the yardage required. Well, if I make it through this week, I can get it!
Tomorrow is Cardio day and the trick will be to fit it in. My grandfather has been admitted to the hospital and will be moved to a nursing facility by the end of the week. I am going to visit him tomorrow and it's an hour drive each way. My youngest son completes his occupational therapy for gross motor skills tomorrow and he has requested Dairy Queen to celebrate. Yikes!! But I will get in the exercise and NOT cheat!

First Crochet Project for My New Body

My first project is the "Hot Mama Swimsuit & Coverup" designed by Tammy Hildebrand. It was published in the July 2007 issue of Crochet Magazine. I haven't been able to find a picture online of it yet- will post when I do. I am using Adrienne Vittadine Emma which is a cotton/viscose/silk yarn. The color is a rich deep red with chocolate tones. I can't wait to get started!

Ug, Picture Time!!!

Ok, so I hate having my picture taken, but it's not like my appearance is a secret to anyone who knows me! I had my oldest son take my picture and the pressure is now on to make the after picture look better than the before.
I need to take my measurements, but couldn't find my measuring tape this morning. I'll have that by the end of the day. I can say that I am a very tight size 18 and my goal during this first challenge is to be a size 14. I'm making my clothes to be more of a size 12, but that's after I've completed 2 challenges (each 12 weeks long).